I can't escape the pain... it's everywhere! (25/02/07)

So, recently I've been starved of sexual pleasure for three weeks; as you can imagine my testicles have turned a rather seductive shade of blue and after doing my daily PC exercises (Not Personal Computer; it's the muscle in your wang), pain is highly plausible. I usually go for about one hundred or so clean (without any restraints) and then pierce my bell end with a dirty sewing needle, then I attach it to my toe and proceed to do a further three. Why three after doing one hundred? Because after attaching the ring in my penis to my toe, the first one dislocates one of them. The second one tears my toe completely off my foot. The third one? I then attach it to a 14 wheeled Juggernaut and gently place a breezeblock onto the accelerator. Then? I wait for it to reach a steady 100 MPH and pull the Juggernaut back into its starting place which shatters the breezeblock and tears the ring out of my penis. I then use the dirty sewing needle which pierced my penis to sew my toe back to my foot and stitch up the tear in my bell end.

Well, that or I put a wet flannel across my penis and proceed to exercise.

Anyway, I ran head first into these exercises and sprained my wang pretty badly. It hurts. A lot. So after a week of having a horrible stabbing pain in my urethra when I urinate, my girlfriend came over! But... the horrible stabbing pain in my urethra when I urinate is still there. Hurting. All the time. Agony. Utter agony. (Un?)Fortunately my girlfriend is too kind to give me a good hard fuck when my knob hurts, so I had to suffer two weeks of not seeing her with only knuckle children to keep me company, and finally another week of no sex.

Great...

So! Anyway, I decided to fap it off today! Yay! ...no, not Yay. Because believe me, it hurt. Holding and fapping was nothing... then I ejaculated. All over. And it hurt. Like hell.

Moral of the story: Tantric men undergo a lot of pain in order to give multiple orgasms after multiple orgasms and blow their load whenever they feel like it. A lot of pain!